Softening the tone of questions with "ne"

We have seen before that 吧 can be used soften the tone of statements, them commands feel more like suggestions. 呢 works the same, but it is used to modify the tone of a question, making it more indirect and uncertain.

呢 used successively with 还是

呢 can be used in the following structure:

V + N + 呢+ 还是 V + N + 呢 +(还是...)

• 去 缅甸 呢，还是 去 越南 呢？还是 去 泰国呢？我 得 想 一 想！
• 打 电脑 游戏 呢，还是 跟 朋友 去 泡 酒吧呢，都 不 太 好！

The example sentences above almost have a tone that the speaker is talking to him/herself, as the question is not directly asked at the listener.

呢 with questions involving interrogative pronouns (哪儿，谁，怎么，什么 etc.)

• 这 是 谁 的 笔呢? (I wonder whose pen this is)
• 这 是 谁 做 的呢? (I wonder who did this?)

In the previous example, the speaker has a tone of conjecture, a bit like saying "I wonder" in English. Again, as in the first example, the question is not directly asked at the listener.

呢 with "verb 不 verb" questions

If a "verb 不 verb" question is posed without 呢, it can appear as though the speaker is a bit impatient, or is ordering the listener to do something. This of course depends on the tone of voice used. Adding 呢 can give a tone of uncertainty, and is more polite.

• 你 去 不 去 逛街？ (Well are you going to go shopping or what??)
• 你 去 不 去 逛街呢？(Are you going to go shopping?)
• 牛奶 你 喝 不 喝？ (Said to a child, with the implication that if the milk isn't drunk, there will be consequences, with emphasis placed on 喝)
• 牛奶你喝不喝呢？ (Perhaps said to a friend, with no implication of coercion. Perhaps you want to clear away their cup)
• 你周末能不能加班？(Perhaps a manager asking a subordinate. This is not too direct, as 能 has been added. Saying 你加不加班 would seem more like an order)
• 你周末能不能加班呢？(Quite indirect, something like "Would you mind coming in on the weekend?")

Again, the above sentences depends on context, and the interpretations given are just examples.

Sources and further reading

外国人实用汉语语法(中英文对照) (A Practical Chinese Grammar for Foreigners)

pp.139-141